the cut off

If you want to see where you’re going in life, most likely you’re heading the same places that your friends are. So if you want to go in a different direction, sadly that means cutting off the people that aren’t doing anything to help you achieve your goals. Sometimes those people are actually the ones who are actively holding you back whether they realize it or not.

I hold on to the people I love with dear life. Some could say I cling too hard for all the wrong reasons. If I ever loved you or cared about you, I will fight to keep you in my life even if I’ve gotten every sign to let go. With that being said, there have been times where it’s gotten to the last straw and I’ve felt like I had no other choice. It’s like shedding dead layers of skin to become a brand new you.

So, how do you “break up” with a toxic friend? I wish I could offer the perfect right answer. All I can say is to not be afraid to do it. Don’t be afraid to end a relationship, romantic or not, that is keeping you from living up to your potential. I remember very specifically how different I felt when I stopped talking to a toxic significant other for a while. I felt like suddenly a whole space in my brain was freed up to occupy something new. I started spending my time more wisely doing the things I cared about and focusing on myself rather than focusing on pleasing somebody else or worrying about them, etc.

If anyone knows about being too afraid to leave your comfort zone, it’s me. My comfort zone is like my protective shell where I feel safe and content. It’s predictable and easy to live there. But you’re not growing if you’re not uncomfortable. Two years ago, I had to break up with my boyfriend who I was extremely comfortable with but that was about the only reason we were together. Just imagining us breaking up scared me to death because I revolved my whole world around that person so I knew my whole world would change. Once it finally did happen, my whole world undoubtedly did change but the outcome was amazing. Now, dropping people who have served their time in my life isn’t scary or daunting. I find it exciting. God doesn’t replace anything unless he’s going to replace it with something better. That’s a fact.

Hold your dear friends as close as you possibly can. Cherish them and realize good friends that motivate you and are there for you no matter what are a dime in a dozen. But those not good friends…don’t let them waste a second of your time any longer. There’s no need to have a huge fall-out filled with drama and tears. Simply start distancing yourself from people who hinder your growth and watch your life blossom.


Thank you Judy Clement Hall for this infographic. She is an amazing artist and writer who inspires me to put the good word out there and be a “love warrior”. Check her out!

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